微微思念｜A Faint Longing

深夜，微微跳動這顆心，還有步履不停的時光。不禁動念，Y想讓時光的步履，改成他心跳的頻率，呼吸之間兩者的差距，無限趨近於一。同步的感覺，靜默此刻與時光同在，浩瀚宇宙於是不遠，滿天星辰都在微微思念的心中。

「一致了嗎？」
靈魂隨興點點頭，而時光順手整理襯衫鈕釦。
「一致了！」
靜默了這片天地，Y的靈魂微笑凝視時光。

「我的生命還有幾天？」
「你想活幾天？」
「永遠！」

聽見這個字，時光斜眼看著一派輕鬆的Y，沉默三秒，然後開口問道：「你想用永遠做什麼呢？」時光端正一下鏡框邊緣，神情嚴肅。
「做我愛做的事，」Y回得不假思索。
時光好奇了，「比如說？」
「等一個人、愛一個人、告....」
Y的語氣不急不緩，最後一字被時光無情打斷。
「既然愛，為何告別？」
「就能思念。」

時光遂用光速測量思念的長短，明顯不信而發問，「永遠思念嗎？」
「直到永遠！」這句話斬釘截鐵，沒有轉圜空間。

「你這痴人！」時光掂量著眼前的Y，試著解釋永恆：「時間建築於空間，你必須先有無限延展的空間，才會得到無限的時間。宇宙雖然浩瀚，還是有盡頭的啊！」
「所以，你也是有限的嗎？」Y反問。
「確實有限，當空間不復存在，我也不復存在，」時光嘆口氣。

「漫長歲月中，難道你就不曾等過一個人、愛過一個人，告別一個人？」
時光皺了皺眉頭，問題似乎擊中敏感神經。

「不曾！」
剎那間，頻率開始偏差，愈來愈遠，對話戛然而止。

Y在檯燈下靜靜痴望窗外，夜更深，滿天星辰還在，還在微微思念的心中。他撫摸著胸口，凝望天邊的星輝。「還在！」夜深人靜、萬籟俱寂，思念的心還在回想，記憶中的美好曾經，恰如河漢星正在閃爍。那一刻，空，時光止步，步履停留思念深處，再以最緩慢的速度，漸遠漸離，捨不得從過去回到如今。

當時光不再以平均等同的速度規律前進，速度緩慢下來的地方，就是思念。Y寫下這句，時光靜默了片刻，然後以最緩的動作站起，與思念同時隱身。

A Faint Longing

Late at night, a heart beats faintly. Time walks on. A thought stirred in Y. He wished to set the footsteps of Time to the rhythm of his heartbeat, so that, breath by breath, the ratio of their frequencies would draw infinitely close to one. To be in sync was to be still in this moment, side by side with Time. The vast universe no longer seemed far away; all the stars in the sky lay within a heart of faint longing.

“Are we in sync?”
The soul gave a careless nod, while Time absently straightened the buttons of his shirt.
“We are.”
Heaven and earth fell silent. Y’s soul smiled and gazed at Time.

“How many days have I left?”
“How many would you like?”
“Forever!”

At the word, Time cast a sideways glance at Y, who looked entirely at ease. Three seconds of silence. Then: “And what would you do with forever?” Time adjusted the rim of his spectacles, his face grave.
“Do what I love,” Y answered without a moment’s thought.
Time grew curious. “Such as?”
“Wait for someone, love someone, say goodb—”
Y spoke neither hurriedly nor slowly, but Time cut the last word short without mercy.
“If you love them, why say goodbye?”
“Then I can long for them.”

Time measured the length of longing at the speed of light. Plainly unconvinced, he asked, “Long for them forever?”
“Until forever ends!” The words were final, leaving no room to bargain.

“You foolish dreamer!” Time weighed Y up, then tried to explain eternity. “Time is built upon space. Only with space that stretches without end can you have time without end. Vast as the universe is, even it has an edge.”
“Then you, too, are finite?” Y asked.
“I am. When space ceases to be, so shall I,” Time sighed.

“In all those long ages, have you never waited for someone, loved someone, said goodbye to someone?”
Time’s brow creased. The question seemed to have struck a nerve.

“Never!”
In an instant their frequencies slipped out of step, drifting further and further apart, and the conversation broke off.

Beneath the desk lamp, Y sat gazing raptly out of the window. The night grew deeper. The stars were still there, still within the heart of faint longing. He laid a hand on his chest and looked toward the starlight on the horizon. Still here. In the deep hush of night, when every sound had gone still, the longing heart kept returning to the beautiful days that once were, shimmering in memory like stars across the River of Heaven. In that moment, emptiness. Time stood still, his footsteps lingering in the depths of longing. Then, ever so slowly, he drifted farther and farther away, reluctant to leave the past for the present.

When Time no longer keeps an even pace, the place where his steps slow is longing.
Y wrote the sentence down. Time fell silent for a moment. Then, in the slowest of motions, a rising, and a vanishing, together with longing.

(Written in Chinese by the author; English translation drafted and revised with AI assistance under the author’s direction. 中文原作由作者撰寫；英譯由作者主導，經 AI 協助起草與修訂。)