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【書摘】在少女們身旁—遇見阿爾貝蒂娜 (Encounter Albertine) 7-2
2016/02/26 05:47
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【書摘】在少女們身旁遇見阿爾貝蒂娜 (Encounter Albertine) 7-2
Variation d’une croyance, néant de l’amour aussi, lequel, préexistant et mobile, s’arrête à l’image d’une femme simplement parce que cette femme sera presque impossible à atteindre. Dès lors on pense moins à la femme, qu’on se représente difficilement, qu’aux moyens de la connaître. Tout un processus d’angoisses se développe et suffit pour fixer notre amour sur celle qui en est l’objet à peine connu de nous. L’amour devient immense, nous ne songeons pas combien la femme réelle y tient peu de place. Et si tout d’un coup, comme au moment où j’avais vu Elstir s’arrêter avec les jeunes filles, nous cessons d’être inquiets, d’avoir de l’angoisse, comme c’est elle qui est tout notre amour, il semble brusquement qu’il se soit évanoui au moment où nous tenons enfin la proie à la valeur de laquelle nous n’avons pas assez pensé.
(l’édition Gallimard, Paris, 1946-47)

愛情的虛無也是信仰的變種。愛情早已存在,正在四處遊動,它停在哪一個女子的形象上,無非因為這個女子幾乎無法企及而已。從這一時刻起,對這個女子想得並不多,腦海中很難現出她的模樣,而考慮更多的是用什麼辦法能夠把她搞到手。一連串的憂思滋長起來,這就足以將我們心中的愛固定在她身上,她成了我們幾乎還不熟悉的愛的對象。愛情變得偌大無比,那個真正的女子在其中占的地位多麼小,我們並不考慮。如果突然間,就像我看見埃爾斯蒂爾停下腳步與少女們說話那個時刻一樣,我們停止焦慮,停止不安,由於我們整個的愛就是她,在我們終於將獵物抓在手裡時,可能驟然間那愛就煙消雲散了,對於這獵物的價值,我們並未足夠地考慮過。
(p.464
追憶似水年華 II 在少女們身旁 聯經版 1992)

愛情的虛無也是信念的變體,愛情是早就存在、遊動不居的,它停在某個女人的形象上,無非是因為這個女人幾乎是無法接近的。從那時起,我們懸懸念念想著的,並不真是這個我們很難浮想她模樣的那個女人,而是怎樣去結識她的辦法。焦慮不安的過程綿延開去,就足以將我們的愛落定在她身上了,她成了愛情的幾乎不認識的對象。愛情變得無邊無涯,我們根本不會想到,現實中的這個女人居然會在其中沒有容身之地。如果突然之間,就像我看見埃爾斯蒂爾停下來和那些少女說話的那個時刻,我們由於知道她就是我們全部的愛,因而不再不安,也不再焦慮了,那麼就在這個我們並沒好好考慮過它的價值的獵物終於到手的一剎那,愛情就會倏地一下子消失不見。
(p.241
追尋逝去的時光 II 在少女花影下 第二部 上海譯文版 周克希譯 2004)

Variance of a belief, annulment also of love, which, pre-existent and mobile, comes to rest at the image of any one woman simply because that woman will be almost impossible of attainment. Thenceforward we think not so much of the woman of whom we find difficult in forming an exact picture, as of the means of getting to know her. A whole series of agonies develops and is sufficient to fix our love definitely upon her who is its almost unknown object. Our love becomes immense; we never dream how small a place in it the real woman occupies. And if suddenly, as at the moment when I had seen Elstir stop to talk to the girls, we cease to be uneasy, to suffer pain, since it is this pain that is the whole of our love, it seems to us as though love had abruptly vanished at the moment when at length we grasp the prey to whose value we had not given enough thought before.
(Translated by C. K. Scott Moncrieff)

A variation in belief can also cause the death of love. Love, mobile and pre-existing, focuses on the image of a certain woman simply because she will be almost certainly unattainable. From then on, one thinks not so much about her, it being difficult to imagine her anyway, as about possible ways of getting to know her. A whole process of anxieties comes into play, which is enough to fixate our love on her, though she is the barely known object of it. Love having become immense, we never reflect on how small a part the woman herself plays in it. And if, as had happened to me when I saw Elstir stop beside the girls, we have sudden cause to lose our feeling of anxiety or uneasiness, since our love amounts to nothing more than that, our love too seems to have vanished at the very moment when we come into possession of a prize the value of which we have never really thought about.
(Translated by James Grieve)

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