當我回想父親給過我的忠告和金玉良言時，腦海中浮現的，不是一句簡單的話，而是一段段他用一生經歷換來的體悟。

父親常說：「政治是非常黑暗的，不要輕易捲入。」他說，一旦踏入其中，各種權力鬥爭與人性的陰暗面，往往會讓人遍體鱗傷。很多政治活動，看似理想，其實只是少數人在爭權奪利，而那些在旁邊付出熱情、搖旗吶喊的人，最後往往只是成就了他人的野心。一旦目的達成，你的付出很可能被棄之如敝屣。運氣好的人，也許能換得一官半職；大多數人，卻只是徒勞無功。

父親之所以說出這樣的話，並非空談，而是來自他的親身經歷。他曾擔任家鄉的鎮長長達八年，後來有意參選水利會會長。在那個年代，候選人需要經過黨提名。當時許多人看好他，但黨卻另有安排，記得那時李煥還曾來我們家勸他放棄競選。最終，他仍決定參選，但結果卻因選票的政治操作而落敗。這段經歷讓他深刻看見政治的現實與殘酷，也成為他後來遠離政壇的重要原因。

另一個讓我印象深刻的忠告，是他對婚姻的看法。他說：「婚姻都是暗茫茫。」意思是，在走進婚姻之前，你無法預知未來會是什麼樣子，但一旦踏入，就必須承擔並繼續走下去。我想，這同樣源於他的親身經歷。當年母親年輕時優秀而美麗，誰也無法預料她經不起後來的人生波折而一蹶不振。雖然母親晚年已經恢復健康，但父親卻已經去世來不及看見。

父親也曾提醒我，婚姻對象最好選擇學歷與背景相當的人。他認為，雙方條件相近，價值觀較容易一致，未來相處也較少衝突。隨著年歲增長，我越能理解其中的現實考量。

還有一點，是他對孩子成長的看法。他常說：「小孩子調皮沒有關係，反而比較有出息。」記得有一次，我的兩個兒子打架，我氣得不行，父親卻笑著說，男孩子打架很正常，這樣反而不容易在外面被欺負。他認為，孩子活潑、有主見，比一味乖巧更重要。這個觀念深深影響了我，讓我學會用更寬容的心態看待孩子的成長，也讓我相信，靈活與勇氣，往往比單純的順從更重要。

回顧這些忠告，我發現父親並沒有給我華麗的道理，而是用他的人生，提醒我看清世界的現實。他的話，有些帶著保護，有些帶著無奈，也有些帶著對未來的期許。

這些，也正是我一生中最珍貴的教誨。

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What is the best advice your father ever gave you?

When I think about the best advice my father ever gave me, I do not recall just one simple sentence. Instead, I remember a collection of lessons shaped by his life experiences.

One of his strongest warnings was about politics. He often said, “Politics can be very dark. Stay away from it.” He believed that once you become involved, you are inevitably exposed to power struggles and the darker sides of human nature. Many political movements, he explained, are not driven by ideals, but by people competing for power. Those who passionately support them often end up serving someone else’s ambition. When those ambitions are fulfilled, your efforts may be easily discarded. A lucky few might gain a position, but most people walk away with nothing.

My father spoke from personal experience. He had served as the mayor of our town for eight years and later decided to run for the head of an irrigation association. At that time, candidates needed party endorsement, much like the primary system in the United States. Although many people believed he would win, the party chose to support someone else. I still remember a party official visiting our home, trying to persuade my father not to run. Despite the pressure, he decided to continue. In the end, they found the ballots were manipulated by the party who tried to convinced him not to run the election. He lost the election under circumstances that left him and his supporters deeply frustrated. That experience revealed to him the harsh realities of politics and ultimately led him to leave it behind.

Another piece of advice he gave me was about marriage. He once said, “Marriage is like stepping into the unknown.” You never truly know what lies ahead, but once you enter, you must keep moving forward. I believe this came from his own life. When he married my mother, she was talented and beautiful, and no one could have predicted the challenges that would come later. Although she eventually recovered in her later years, my father did not live to see it. His experience gave him a sense of both realism and quiet resignation about marriage.

He also believed that people should marry someone with a similar educational background. In his view, shared education often reflects similar values and life experiences, which can reduce conflict in the future. When I was younger, I did not fully agree with him, but as I grew older, I began to understand the practicality behind his thinking.

Finally, one piece of advice that deeply influenced me was about raising children. He used to say, “It’s okay for children to be mischievous. They will grow up to be more adaptable.” I remember getting angry when my two sons fought as children, but my father simply laughed and said it was normal. He believed that lively, spirited children are less likely to be bullied and more capable of navigating the real world. That perspective changed the way I raised my children. I learned to be more tolerant and to value independence and resilience over mere obedience.

Looking back, my father did not offer polished or idealistic advice. Instead, he shared truths shaped by experience. Some of his words carried protection, some reflected disappointment, and others revealed hope.

Together, they have become the most valuable lessons of my life.