我母親是一個非常健談的人。她喜歡發表自己的見解，也喜歡回顧自己的人生。從我有記憶以來，她常常講起她的阿嬤說過什麼、她的父母說過什麼。她說，小時候的她特別喜歡聽大人說話，總是把每一句話牢牢記在心裡。

由於她家裡經商，往來的人多，員工也多，許多長輩都很驚訝，她從小就能和大人自然對話，而且記憶力極佳，對大人說過的話幾乎過耳不忘。也因為如此，她長大後，總能把這些話再傳給我們。

我們家有六個孩子，從小就習慣聽母親一個人滔滔不絕談她的童年往事。就在這樣日復一日的耳濡目染之中，我不知不覺吸收了她許多人生的智慧與獨特的見解。

在她眾多「高論」之中，有幾句話對我影響特別深刻。

第一句是：「我們又不需要到別人的飯鍋裡面拿飯，有什麼好怕的？」
每當我因為別人的眼光而感到膽怯，或不敢表達自己的想法時，母親就會這樣對我說。她的意思是，如果一個人能夠經濟獨立、人格自主，就不需要過度在意別人的評價與閒言閒語。

這句話深深影響了我。長大之後，我發現自己並不太在意別人的批評。在公開場合，我敢於表達自己的意見，也不太擔心別人的看法。因為我知道，我不需要依賴他人而活，自然也不必被他人的聲音所左右。

第二句讓我印象深刻的，是一句台灣的俚語：「樹若站得正，不怕尾搖風。」
意思是，只要樹幹挺直，就不怕枝葉在風中搖擺。母親用這句話告訴我們，一個人只要立場堅定、內心穩固，就不容易被外界動搖。

這也影響了我的思考方式。我不容易人云亦云，不會因為別人怎麼說就盲目相信，而是傾向自己思考、判斷。我相信，這份獨立性，正是來自母親這句話的潛移默化。

第三個影響，更深層也更長遠。母親常常感謝「上帝」。她所說的上帝，不一定是特定宗教中的神，而是一種對天地之間更高力量的敬畏與相信。她常說：「人不要太自以為了不起，若不是上天保守，你不可能擁有今天的一切。」

這樣的觀念，讓我學會謙卑。我從不覺得自己現在所擁有的一切——三個優秀的孩子、尚可的健康、穩定的經濟，以及尚未顯老的外表——完全是憑自己的努力得來的。我更願意相信，這些都是一種恩典，是在我有限的努力之外，額外被賜予的祝福。

因為我也清楚，人生本可以有許多不同的可能。我可能會遭遇經濟困難，也可能健康不佳，甚至家庭狀況也可能完全不同。正因如此，我更懂得感恩，也更不敢驕傲。

回頭看，母親並沒有用正式的方式「教導」我人生哲學。她只是透過不斷地說話、分享與回憶，把她的價值觀一點一滴地種在我們心中。而這些看似隨意的言語，卻成為我一生中最重要的指引。

如果要我說，母親給我最好的建議是什麼，那不是一句單獨的話，而是一種態度：
勇敢做自己，獨立不依附；堅定站立，不隨波逐流；並且在一切之上，保持謙卑與感恩。

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What is the best advice your mother ever gave you?

My mother is a very talkative person. She loves to share her opinions and often reflects on her own life. Growing up, I constantly heard her talk about what her grandmother had said, what her parents had taught her, and the many lessons she had absorbed as a child.

She often told us that when she was young, she loved listening to adults. Whatever they said, she would remember. Because her family ran a business and had many employees, she had frequent opportunities to interact with grown-ups. Many of them were surprised that such a young child could carry on conversations with adults and remember their words so clearly.

As a result, she grew up with a rich collection of wisdom—and she passed it on to us in the same way.

There were six children in our family, and we grew up listening to our mother talk about her childhood. She would sit and speak at length, recalling stories and repeating what her elders had once told her. Without realizing it, I absorbed much of her philosophy of life through these everyday conversations.

Among the many things she said, a few have stayed with me more deeply than others.

The first is this: “We don’t need to take food from someone else’s pot—so what is there to be afraid of?”
She would say this whenever I felt intimidated by others or hesitated to express myself. What she meant was simple but powerful: if you are independent and able to support yourself, you don’t need to be overly concerned about what others think or say.

This idea has shaped who I am. As an adult, I find that I am not overly affected by criticism. I am willing to speak my mind in public, and I do not worry too much about how others may judge me. I believe I have the right to express my thoughts, and since I do not depend on others for my livelihood, I do not need to be controlled by their opinions.

The second piece of advice comes from a Taiwanese saying she often quoted: “If the tree stands upright, it does not fear the wind shaking its branches.”
In other words, if a person is grounded and steady, they will not be easily swayed by external forces.

This has deeply influenced the way I think. I do not simply follow the crowd or accept ideas just because others believe them. I prefer to think for myself and form my own judgments. Looking back, I believe this independence of mind comes, in part, from this teaching of my mother.

The third lesson is perhaps the most profound. My mother often expressed gratitude to “God.” By this, she did not necessarily mean the Christian God, but rather a higher power—something beyond human control. She would say, “Do not think too highly of yourself. If heaven does not grant it, you cannot have it.”

This belief taught me humility. I do not see the blessings in my life—my three wonderful children, my relatively good health, my stable financial situation, even my youthful appearance—as purely the result of my own efforts. Instead, I see them as gifts, as grace.

Because I know things could have been very different. I could have faced financial hardship, poor health, or other difficulties. So whatever I have today, I receive it with gratitude rather than pride.

Looking back, my mother never formally “taught” me these lessons. She simply talked—constantly, vividly, and sincerely. Yet through her words, her values quietly took root in my heart.

If I had to name the best advice my mother ever gave me, it would not be a single sentence, but a way of living:
to be independent and unafraid, to stand firm and think for myself, and above all, to remain humble and grateful.