Every valley shall be raised up, every mountain and hill made low; the rough ground shall become level, the rugged places a plain.And the glory of the LORD will be revealed, and all mankind together will see it. For the mouth of the LORD has spoken."A voice says, "Cry out." And I said, "What shall I cry?" "All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field.The grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the LORD blows on them. Surely the people are grass.The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever."  (Isaiha 40:4-8)

我在讀這段以及40:21-31的時候，老實說，我想的是:

我知道 神很偉大啦! 可是我的問題還是沒解決啊! 他真的會幫我嗎?

如果會，為什麼不直接告訴我該怎麼辦就好? 還要跟我說這些五四三?

How to renew my strength?

祂最近好像一直在修剪我，既然在修剪，又怎麼使我重新得力???

後來，安靜片刻，我知道我把自己看得太大了。所以我只關心我、我、我。

就因為我太想得到讚賞(不論是對我或對寶寶)，

以至於緊繃地不想聽到負面的玩笑、洗腦般地不斷強調寶寶的聰明或優點或優越之處，

對一些評論在心中默默嗤之以鼻，忽略別人的優點，甚至否定對方的看法/作法。

忽略別人的優點，並不會顯出自己比較厲害，只是讓自己變得更加寂寞而已。

因為那股優越感是驕傲的根源，是自我保護及自我肯定的屏障，是包裝"爭競比較"的糖衣

如果你沒肯定我，我就更不需要肯定你了，因為我比較"優越"。這是甚麼鬼心態?!!

然而，祂知道我。不嫌棄我這樣的罪性，還從遠方召我。

"But you, O Israel, my servant, Jacob, whom I have chosen, you descendants of Abraham my friend, I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you.So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."All who rage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced; those who oppose you will be as nothing and perish. Though you search for your enemies, you will not find them. Those who wage war against you will be as nothing at all. For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.Do not be afraid, O worm Jacob, O little Israel, for I myself will help you," declares the LORD, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel."See, I will make you into a threshing sledge, new and sharp, with many teeth. You will thresh the mountains and crush them, and reduce the hills to chaff.You will winnow them, the wind will pick them up, and a gale will blow them away. But you will rejoice in the LORD and glory in the Holy One of Israel.(Isaiha 41:8-16)

我想起過去一些經驗，祂的信實與公義，我又安心了。

只管跟隨 神吧!  祂會負責的!

雖然我還有很多事情做得不夠，沒有勇氣，放棄機會，膽小懦弱，

還張牙舞爪掩飾那些懦弱，

但我願意重新交出我的手，讓 神帶領，擴張境界。

希望再次回去，會有不一樣的風景!