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Mom , You have me !
2005/10/19 06:27
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Mom , You have me
.............................................

I just finished reading your essay....
I didn't understand everything you wrote
cause my Chinese is not that good,
but I think I understood most of it.

剛剛讀完你的那篇"情願孤獨" ,
我的中文不是那麼好, 所以不能完全明白你所寫的.
但是大部分我都了解.

I realized just how much you and I are alike...
I don't like telling people my deepest feelings
and thoughts either, I find it hard to open myself up.

發現自己跟你是多麼相像 ,
不喜歡告訴人們內心深處的感覺和想法.
我很難將自己放開.

I have one person right now,
to this day that I can call a "true" friend
(other than you , of course) and that is Flora.

到目前為止, 我只有一個稱得上是真正的朋友,
(當然除了你以外) 那就是Flora.

There are things even you and her do not know...
I don't make friends very easily.
I've been told by many people who just met me say that
their first impression of me is "snob".
Why? I do not know.

有些事, 旣使是你或她都不曉得.
我很難結交朋友, 一些剛剛見面的人告訴我,
他們對我的第一個印象是高傲. 爲什麼? 我不知道.

There are many occasions where I cannot add
to conversations cause I cannot relate.
Sometimes it's about brand name clothes,
which I do not care for also,

有一些場合, 我無法加入話題, 因為跟那些沒有關係.
好像說名牌服飾, 我一點都不在意.

sometimes it's about how awful their sister/ brother
was to them which I have neither,
or how their dad has a new girlfriend
because their parents are divorced,

有時是談論, 關於他們可怕的兄弟姐妹, 可是我也沒有.
或者說, 他們的爸爸有了新女友, 因為父母離婚了.

or which fancy restaurant they went to eat
at the other day where one dish was $60,
many topics I find I can't contribute to.

或者說有一天 , 他們去過那家高級餐廳, 一道菜就要六十塊.
很多的話題, 我真的無法投入.

I find myself kind-of stuck in the middle...
white kids lifestyle I cannot relate to
cause I was not brought up in a fully American household,
Chinese kids think I am too "Americanized"
and I cannot relate to them either.

我發現自己好像被卡在中間; 動彈不得.
跟白人孩子的生活方式沒有相連 , 因為我不是在美式家庭長大.
中國孩子覺得我太洋化, 所以我跟他們都無法溝通.

Then there are kids who are like me who
came to Canada very young or was born here...
but I can't seem to relate to them either.
I guess I've always been different
and people see that so they keep their distance.

然而那些跟我一樣,
在很小的時候就來到加拿大, 或是在這兒出生.
唉! 我也一樣跟他們有隔閡.
我猜人們也看到我的不同 , 所以和我保持距離.

I have this wall up too, I've built a very high wall,
even since junior high that wall has never come down
maybe because when I was little kids were so mean to me.

我也讓這道牆越築越高, 旣使讀中學時, 這道牆也沒倒塌過 .
也許因為當我是小孩子時, 曾被傷害過.

I grew up fine, a little "reserved" and constantly cautious
but overall I think I've become a strong young woman.
Most of my "friends" in Montreal have never seen me cry
or even angry, cause I fake a smile
even when something is bothering me.

長大後, 我變得有點沉默和經常小心謹慎.
但大致上 我算是一個堅強的年輕女性.
大多數的朋友從沒見過我哭泣 ˋ生氣 ,
旣使當時被一些事困擾著, 我都會用微笑掩飾.

I don't let them see any of weaknesses.
I put on a strong face...
but sometimes pretending to be strong becomes so tiring.

不想讓他們看到我的軟弱 , 我戴上堅強的面具.
但是有時假裝堅強 ; 卻讓我覺得很疲倦.

I understand you mom...
I find it hard to trust people, and it seems when I do...
90% of those end up disappointing me.

我了解你, 媽媽.
我知道很難去信任別人, 因為我曾這麼作過,
但是有百分之九十的人, 最後都讓我失望了.

I'm not sure if I completely understood your essay
but I think I got an overall idea of what you were saying.
I love you mom and you're MY best friend, you have me :)

不確定完全明白你的文章, 但是大致上, 我都知道你想說什麼.
我愛你! 媽媽, 你是我最好的朋友.
你有我 , 你永遠都不是孤獨的.



恰恰的女兒 Fiona 2005.10.12



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迴響（15） ：
15樓. 風城行者
2005/11/12 13:05
and so many admirers

Essay not only you read , but also include the one who is the essay's admirer .

風城行者 留

14樓.
2005/10/27 03:57
nice article

My daughter is born in USA. She always tells me that I am her best friend in Chinese and English, even though she is only 5.  I always wonder what she will be when she grows up. Maybe one day she doesn't know Chinese any more. I hope she can still understand me and treat me as her best friend, just like your daughter. Thanks for sharing the lovely article.

13樓. 牽引
2005/10/20 10:01
一早就讓人家掉眼淚～

看著看著，怎麼覺得好像我和我媽之間～～

不過恰恰女比較孝順又賢慧，手又細緻美麗：）

人家一邊吃麵包一邊掉眼淚，我同事還以為我吃到餿掉的過期麵包＠＠


只要有心，到哪裡都不遠。
12樓. 阿菊
2005/10/20 09:52
恰恰

我女兒送給你

會不會變得比較體貼？

經常當孝順女兒的老媽～阿菊


溫度在變化，你的心，也在變化嗎？
11樓. 123酷媽
2005/10/20 09:02
早就知道母女情深啦~
恰恰
請告訴妳女兒
她非常上相
尤其她把頭髮打濕了拿著刀那張
一付「你再來亂試試看」的架勢
很好很好~

不過她戴著蓬蓬頭假髮
怎麼讓酷媽想起Julia小喵啊？

喔！這裡不是談攝影
是談女兒給媽媽的信
酷媽還能說什麼呢
當然將心比心
感動啦！
七月，一片金紅豔豔。
10樓. 恰恰
2005/10/20 06:00
謝謝三貓

在公司看到你的回應 又高興又心酸

想到她的童年 我讓她受苦了 雖然我一直努力

把最好的都給她 但是總有一些無奈

她在蒙特婁獨自生活五年 我花了很多錢

但是看她成熟獨立 我很安慰

謝謝你 讓我看到她的手 修長典雅 是藝術家的手

有人稱讚過 美麗的手

9樓. ANY愛妮
2005/10/20 05:56
幸福
看文章 聽背景音樂 為什麼害我眼框氾紅 ?
ANY 你可以延伸為 Anything, Anywhere, Anyone, Anybody, Anyway......
8樓. 恰恰
2005/10/20 05:55
Fiona 攝影作品展

我剛剛整理出一本相簿 上次是萬聖節化妝照

這次是她攝影課的作品 用三角架 自己攝影

自己在暗房沖洗  一手包辦

主題是表現不同風格的自己 共有八張

我放兩星期就會刪除 趕快去看

她今年二十五歲 在溫哥華讀廣告設計

7樓.
2005/10/20 03:26
so sweet
so sweet !!
6樓. nomore
2005/10/20 01:27
Fiona畫圖
這是前幾天她在畫圖的時候我幫她拍的




20幾年前
二貓和Fiona曾在我家住過一陣子
那時二貓出門去教書
Fiona就會哭到嘴巴成四角形的
到現在印象還很深刻

這一個多月來
只有我和她在同一個屋簷下
我迷上做動畫
常常關了電腦就直接上床睡覺
貼心的她總會幫我把電鍋插頭拔掉
瓦斯爐上的湯鍋放進冰箱
有其他一些拉拉雜雜的生活細節也都打點的很好
ㄟ
我很懷疑
是同一個女孩嗎
^____^

還有....
二貓
我很累喔
你貼了三個地方
我也跟著回應三次
@__@
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